I see all these insects and I wonder where they're coming from and they probably wonder the same thing about me. I was a cartoon pig when I said that. Picture a cartoon pig and read the first sentence again. Picture a German diplomat and read the previous sentence again. Picture a French chanteuse and read the previous sentence again. Picture a red dot and look up at the ceiling/roof/sky/person-looking-down/void/floor-if-you're-hanging-upside-down. I wouldn't hang upside down if I were you. Picture your doctor and read the previous sentence again.

He fights villains and aliens with the other local superheroes. Sometimes their missions are more mundane, like getting cats down from trees or squeezing the water out of birds who get wet in the rain. Sometimes they have to stop the aliens from conducting experiments to answer stupid questions.

He wanted to get back in her good books by doing something superhero-like for her. He asked her if there were any villains bothering her, or aliens annoying her cat. She said that if he wanted to do a favour for her he could find out what her sister is up to. She's hardly ever at home in the evenings, and she always changes the subject when you ask her where she's been.

Spying on women is the sort of thing villains would normally do. He got the advice of some villains who owed him a favour after he rescued them from the aliens. They gave him classes in spying on women. He got beaten up many times before he became good at it. After two weeks training he was ready to spy on Emily's sister.

He saw her leaving the house wearing a hat and sunglasses, even though the sun had gone down. He followed her to a house about a mile away. When he looked in the window he saw her playing the flute with a band. They performed the songs written by the man who played the xylophone. He used to play with a wedding band who wore top hats. They let the bees in their hats make most of the music. The only reason they played their instruments was to ease the stress of having bees in their top hats.

Emily was hoping for something more scandalous than this, but she appreciated all the effort Billy had put in. "It wasn't a wedding dress," she said. "It was her costume for a Renaissance Fair."