On a fine summer day when I was dead I used my head to knock a door down. At the time I didn't think I'd ever have to use my head again for everyday purposes like making women say 'What are you looking at?', but I was wrong about that. I was wrong about a lot of things. I was right about one thing, but I can't remember what it is.

Everything in life has a purpose, even cats who draw dots on things. My purpose is to draw dots on cats. The bees buzz until their trousers fall down. Ann makes bee-trousers, and some people say she's evil but I think they mean to say 'oval'.

Tim met Ann on the street one day. He was taking his new hair style out for a walk. She was transfixed by the hair. She wanted to spend more time looking at it, so she invited him on a picnic.

They went to a mountainside for their picnic. She enjoyed it more than he did. Her penguin sandwiches tasted funny. He was looking for an excuse to get away, so he wasn't disappointed when the wolf arrived.

They ran up the mountainside to get away from the wolf. They kept running until they came to Hugh's house.

Hugh farms icicles on his house during the winter. He grew some extraordinary icicles last winter. He won a prize at an icicle competition. He sells them at a market stall and he gives some to his neighbours. They often give him things in return. The woman with hexagonal feet gave him hexagonal shoes. A film-maker lives further up the mountain. He didn't have anything to give in return, so he offered to make a film of Hugh working on his icicle farm. Hugh said there would be very little to film, but the director told him that his last film was about a man who was trying to teach a salmon what a gun was. Nothing much happened in this, but it was one of his best films. By the end, the man had come to some sort of understanding with the salmon.

Ann and Tim asked Hugh if they could wait in his house until the wolf went away. He told them they could stay for as long as they wanted. He made them some tea, and he showed them the film made about his work. At the start of the film, he was shown putting on his coat, his scarf and his gloves before going out to check on his icicles. Hugh tried to drag this out for as long as possible. He spoke about his uncle Phil who never left the house without putting on his gloves. This was because of his fear of leaving finger prints on things. After going outside, Hugh inspected each one of his icicles. He added drops of water to some, but for most of them he just offered words of encouragement.

Ann and Tim had been watching the film for an hour before they saw Hugh complete his inspection. They weren't expecting the next hour to be any more interesting, but before Hugh went back into his house the camera turned around and they saw an angel who'd shake every few seconds. Every time the angel shook, dozens of rubber ducks fell out of her. These ducks slid away down the mountainside on the snow. Many of them ended up in the river.

As they watched the closing credits of the film, Ann asked Hugh about the angel. He took them out to his shed, where he had a box full of rubber ducks. He gave them one of the ducks. They went back to their picnic rug, and they used the duck to frighten the wolf away. Tim was disappointed to find that the wolf hadn't touched the penguin sandwiches.

Grey  # 2:50 AM